Italy this year looks different

I *almost* posted this Wednesday, but it was the first of April, and the common wisdom says that nothing posted on April Fools Day should be trusted as fact.

I wanted you to believe me when I tell you this.

After much prayer and thought, I have decided to remain state-side this year while my husband goes back to Milan in May.

To explain why, let me tell you the story.

Around November, as I was praying for my friends in Italy and for the coming mission trip, I felt a hesitancy that was as unexpected as it was strong. Why does this year feel different? I wondered.

 The following week, my beautiful younger sister got a sparkling rock on her left hand. A wedding was quickly set for June. Only a few short weeks later, my other sister and her husband welcomed a sweet baby girl to our family. In our close-knit clan, babies and weddings are all-hands-on-deck affairs--a chance to pour love through action and presence.

I was torn. On the one hand, I could not wait to see my friends in Milan. I longed to grieve with the church there over the recent death of one of the missionaries, to continue the conversations about life and Jesus with those I met in the last three years, and to feel the joy of serving alongside my husband in a place we've both come to love.

On the other hand was a growing desire to grasp these momentous moments with my sisters. But it felt almost selfish to consider choosing family over a mission trip.

There was not enough vacation for both.

However, as I prayed, I became convinced that loving my sisters and their families was this year's mission. And, as I realized several years ago, even spiritual things like a mission trip overseas can be downright disobedient if the Lord is asking me to do something else.

So while it feels odd to reach March without a flurry of support-raising, I am filled with peace. When I get home and see the coffee cups from an Italy meeting cluttering the countertop by the sink, I smile, knowing that God has hand-picked these seven volunteers. It is a good team, and they will succeed.

And that's not all.

God has been dropping ideas into the now-peaceful pool of my heart. Each one sends excited ripples to the very edges of me until I can hardly sit still! I may be here, an ocean away from the team for two weeks, but those two weeks have a purpose. The purpose is slowly forming into a plan, but that will have to wait until the next post. :)

Stay tuned! 

FMF {Five Minute Friday}: Break

I know it's already Saturday, but I'm jumping in with the FMF crowd! In case you're not in the loop, Five Minute Friday is a community of bloggers who come together each week to write like crazy for five wild, unedited minutes on a single prompt. This week, the prompt is "Break".

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I love being with people, even crowds. Six people spending the night? Woohoo!

I also love times of silence when I can just chill and think and organize that hall closet. Yes, I'm weird. 

Because of this tension, I've never been able to decide whether I'm an outgoing introvert or a downtime-loving extrovert. Regardless, I often fee a twinge of unease when I see a full calendar. Even if all the things on it are good, something in me starts gasping for air prematurely, and any little blank spaces suddenly seem very precious. If I'm not careful, I can become a downright miserly creature who hoards scraps of time like a dragon hoards gold.

Last week was Spring Break, and as a staff member at the university I got three glorious days off from work. #perksofworkingforacademia

In case you don't know him, I'm married to an extremely extroverted I-wanna-be-where-the-people-are type of man (cue Little Mermaid). When he began filling our tiny break to the brim with appointments and brunches and last-minute hangouts, I started to wonder if I would need a vacation after the vacation.

Dear God, I prayed, please help me not to be a blank space miser. I give you the time--you take care of me. 

Those three days turned out to be some of the most refreshing, fun days we've enjoyed in months!

We looked at dinosaur bones and butterflies at the Houston Museum of Natural Science.

We laughed until our abs ached with old friends.

We feasted at the Cheesecake Factory with my mother-in-love.

We played Phase 10 until after bedtime, and I didn't even care that I came in last place.

We caught up with precious old friends whose baby is now old enough to look up elephant pictures on my phone (how did he get so big??????)

Then--this was the whole reason we went to H-town to start with--we spent a delightful rainy afternoon celebrating one of my dearest friends at her baby shower.

Finally, my Dallas-bound family caravanned back to our place for the night. (There's that 6-person sleepover!)

Oh, and my new favorite thing to do is make my beautiful niece laugh. Click here to see how much she's grown in two months! 

P.S. I just realized that we went to the Cheesecake Factory on our last Spring Break too. It's actually a crazy coincidence, since we don't have one within one hundred miles of our house. Maybe we'll make a new tradition?

My life is like the movies

I have a crazy story for you. 

It was lunchtime a few weeks ago on a workday. I was chasing the last of my food with my fork when I got an odd text from my friend, Macie.

“Cherise, have you ever been to Pine Cove?”

And then, two seconds later—“And did you ever live at [insert address]?”

Um…yes. I had been to that family camp many times, but not since I was in high school. And that was my old address.

Immediately, my mind started running through bizarre explanations for why she might be asking. Did the camp release some ancient video online that showed pictures of me? Did I lose something at Pine Cove that had my old address in it? Why would she have it?

The truth was stranger than I guessed.

Macie is the kind of girl to whom encouragement is like air: she breathes it in eagerly and then exhales it to everyone around her. Just standing near her is like a fresh breeze to your heart. When I met her, she was a week away from marrying one of my hubby’s best friends. Our apartments stand facing each other now across the street, just right for five-minute conversations if we happen to be getting home at the same time.

Because words hold such weight for her, she has kept a growing stash of encouragement in a burgeoning drawer somewhere in her house. On the day of the weird text, she’d been doing some spring cleaning and decided to sift through a stack of notes from 2003, the year she had become a believer in Jesus.

One of the notes was from a camper she met while working at Pine Cove as a counselor. It was written in careful cursive on notebook paper decorated with gel pen swirls.

It was chatty, talking about summer plans to go camping and about how the writer was about to get her driver's permit. It told Macie she had a beautiful heart and that the note-writer was praying for her. 

It was signed, “Cherise Beekman”.

Y’all. That camper was ME.

It's seriously like a movie! I can picture it in lights: “Girl discovers that she knew her friend before she really knew her.” We had a first class freak out on the phone as we uncovered our secret past.

That summer in 2003, my dad had been out of work nearly eight months. My sweet grandma had died of cancer only a few weeks after the layoff, and our family had been feeling the strain of change, grief, and uncertainty. Some kind person paid for us to go to Pine Cove as a family. The counselors were wonderful—so grown up and so kind to the bony fifteen year old and her three younger sisters.

One of them was a bouncy person with flaming hair and a big smile who went by—wait for it—“Hip Hop Anonymous”. Isn’t that a great name for her?

So our friendship didn’t actually begin in 2008 when Macie bounced in to Jenny’s apartment with leftover wedding shower cake to share. In reality, I met Hip Hop Anonymous in 2003, before our husbands ever laid eyes on each other and before Macie ever joined our church!

God knew we were meant to be friends. J

Five Minute Friday:: Adore

Last year my windows were festooned with ribbons, like peppermint stripes to the floor. Colored lights glowed at the door, and the Christmas candles flickered in the hallway bathroom. Even the couch had a snowman pillow on it. 

This year, my 2-foot tree is the only bit of Christmas in an otherwise very normal, every-day living room. Only one present is wrapped. Another present sits on my desk in a brown box, exactly as it looked when the UPS guy dropped it off last night. All other presents are still at the store, undiscovered. It has been a busy month, filled with goodbyes to students who are returning home after the semester, graduation parties and unexpected guests. 

But my heart feels quiet. Anticipatory. 

For the first time, my husband and I decided to celebrate Advent. 

We bought a cheap brass candle ring online that came with the purple and pink tapers, and we downloaded a devotional by John Piper. We read it from the glowing screen of the phone as we lie in bed each night. 

The words have been garlanding my heart with awe. 

That the King would come, not to be served but to serve? The realization spreads fresh across my duty-bent heart like a red carpet to welcome him. 

And that star that God placed in the sky millennia in advance, timed to perfection so that men who scanned the night for signs would see it--dazzling. The sheer scale of planning that went into His entrance sends fiery sparks of worship through my heart, brighter than any tinsel. 

My house may look pretty much as it did in October, but I can feel Christmas within me. More of Christ. More adoration for my King, the one who let himself be made small and weak to bring me near. 

Love in San Antonio

Last month, my love and I stole away from everyday life to celebrate our 3-year anniversary in San Antonio. We were a month or so late, but who cares, right? What a fun, exciting city! 

Each summer since we married in 2011, we've tried our best to set aside a little money so we can step out of our normal routine and go celebrate each other. We know it may not be possible every year to actually leave town, but we're making the most of it while we can! 

This year, we were excited to stumble across a Groupon deal for a hotel within walking distance of the Riverwalk.

Even though I've lived in TX all my life, it was my first-ever time to visit the Alamo. (I know, you're probably thinking I'm the worst Texan ever...but better late than never!) 

Because of its prominence in TX history textbooks and movies, I think I expected the building itself to be bigger. The portion pictured above was actually one of the smaller parts of the low, single-storied compound. Admission to the grounds was free, but we quickly realized that our knowledge of the site and the battle fought there was pretty pathetic. Trying to figure out the story from the signs and displays was overwhelming, so...

we bought a set of audio tours! 

 Seriously, it was the best $10 we spent on the whole trip. 

We also bought a sno cone--and the experience of buying it next to the Alamo--for the low price of $4.

It was delicious. 

A roaming mariachi band kept popping up at different points throughout the day, offering their music to families lunching outside. Finally, I asked one of the band members if I could take his picture. 

Nice tie, senor. 

We walked miles of sun-dappled narrow sidewalks lined with river on the left and restaurant tables on the right. 

The walk was beautiful, but it finally wore us out. We found a steakhouse and plopped our tired selves into the barstools--the only seating available. 

The large group in the back appeared to be celebrating a birthday. A woman was trying to give a speech, but we could tell that she was having a hard time making herself heard. The restaurant staff found a microphone for her, and suddenly we were part of the audience. 

Her husband was celebrating his retirement from the military after a long career. We lingered over the end of our meal to enjoy the stories of a man we didn't know. 

We left feeling romantic, thinking about growing old together like the couple we'd seen. We are still only at the start of this beautiful journey. 

We heard jazz music and followed it to an Italian cafe for dessert. We had coffee and tiramisu and conversation with a Hawaiian bartender named Rodger who ended up making the tiramisu complementary when he heard why we were in town. 

The jazz music was live, and the singer decided we needed a song to call "our song". 

He sang "What are you doing with the rest of your life?" while we danced between the tables. 

Still sometimes can't believe that we're grown and married and can do grownup things like rent a hotel in a beautiful city and explore it together.

And guess where our church's next church plan team is going? UT San Antonio! I had no idea while we were there, but now that I know, I am super excited! I can already imagine the team having homegroup hangouts on the Riverwalk, talking with passerby about Jesus, and enjoying the fun music scene.

Related Links:

My thoughts on our *actual* anniversary this year. 

The crazy adventures we had on our first anniversary. (crazy is not an exaggeration!)

An overdue update!

Our first week here in Milan is drawing to a close, and the stories are starting to pile up, so it's time for an update!

Our team is finally (thankfully) out from under the foggy influence of travel fatigue, and I've watched everyone get more and more comfortable with the daily routine, using public transport, ordering food, and speaking to the Italian students. Even though I've been to Milan twice before, it always takes me a few days to re-remember how things work, and I've had some hiliarious moments as I've tried to stumble through pronunciations or figure out what someone just asked me.

It helps to remember that if we feel unsure, the Italian students are often just as nervous (if not more) than we are. We might be in a foreign country, but at least we get to remain in the comfort of our own language.

On the first day of English Clubs, we played games and made small talk and laughed as we tried to pronounce everyone's name. My name is hard even for Americans to pronounce and remember, but it's a real doozie for them. However, Gabrielle, one of the girls on our team, simply switched out the "e" at the end of her name for an "a", and voila! She has an Italian name! Some of the students even mistook her for an Italian when they glanced at her nametag. :)

The first day was good, but the second was amazing! Instead of going to a classroom, we all trooped to a beautiful park that sits a short mile or so from campus. In the bright sunshine and pollen we played soccer (pronounced "futbol" here, just as in Mexico), and even taught the students to play Ultimate Frisbee. They got really competitive!

I brought my tennis shoes to play, but I ended up talking in the shade with some of the girls who didn't want to run around. As we discussed cultural differences, our families, and our dreams for the future, I found myself thinking that these girls were the ages of my sisters.

The awesome conversations continued at the "aperitivo" (happy hour) at a campus cafe. We crowded over twenty people around the tables, laughing at the wind that kept blowing our napkins and food into our laps.

Today was probably the best day yet, but it's 1 am here in Milan and tomorrow Jordan are boarding a train for Turin early in the morning (a last-minute trip that we planned just today!), so I need to sign off.

But please don't stop praying! All week, in both my personal times with Jesus and times with the team, I've been learning about the necessity, urgency and privilege of prayer.

Your prayers matter. 

They move the heart of God to move in the hearts and circumstances of people, and we know that nothing we do will have lasting fruit unless it's done in His strength.

Please pray: 

• That many students would join our team as they go sight-seeing around the center of Milan tomorrow (10 hrs from the time of this post)
• For our team to be encouraged and joyful
• For the three students I got to share my story with tonight!!! (Ohh, it was so exciting!! But you'll have to wait until the next post. :) ) 

Ciao-dy, Milan! It's been a while

We're here! After 22 hours, two flights, a 5-hour layover and a van ride through Milan, we finally hoisted our bags and our sleepy selves upstairs at our hotel this morning at around 11:30 am local time.

(For family members who are curious, Milan is seven hours ahead of TX time. Our bodies felt like it was 3:30 am.)

Hubby zonked out during the layover in Newark

The Alps! 

The bus ride through Milan from the airport

First meal in Italy! So much fun reconnecting with the team and meeting a new friend as well.

Here we are! Exhausted to the core, but thankful for a safe trip.

The hubs is signaling that blogging time has expired, so I'll let the pictures be enough for now. Please pray for our team to be well rested tomorrow as we begin the first week of English Clubs and meet students on campus tomorrow!

If you're wondering why we're in Italy, click here, and then join us by praying!

Texas isn't so big after all

After our recent camping trip with our homegroup, I am re-convinced of two things:

1. Food cooked over a fire just tastes better!
2. And God has a sense of humor that is as generous as it is mischievous.

Eight of us drove over the wildflowered Texan countryside to finally arrive after dark. It was the first camping trip several of the girls had ever taken, but they were great sports about the bugs and sleeping on the ground!

We even pitched our tent before before the guys had theirs up. (Not that it was a race or anything.)

I'm no outdoor expert, but my childhood is crowded with memories of helping Daddy set up our big three-room tent, of marshmallows browned to perfection over dancing flames, and of milky air full of morning sunshine as we rolled out of our sleeping bags. Other families went to Disneyland or Vegas--this was our vacation of choice. We reveled in the gloriously unscheduled freedom of unexplored woods and lakes and the chance to play with learn how to responsibly build a fire.

That weekend the weather was straight out of a camping magazine: crisp and cool evenings, with warm, breezy middays that made you wistful for a hammock. The night was cool and bright with stars. The group built a fire and talked for hours as the moon traced a path on the lake.

 The next morning, we had just finished some delicious breakfast tacos when it happened.

Hubby slyly tugged on my shoulder and pointed to the road. There, walking along toward us were my AUNT AND UNCLE and two of their dear friends!

My Uncle Dave was able to film my reaction with his iPhone. Enjoy this short clip of my shock:

Apparently, my aunt and uncle were camping with their friends only six campsites down the way. My husband and uncle had bumped into each other earlier that morning at the bathroom shared by all the campsites in our loop. They walked past each other before recognition kicked in, but once they realized the connect, they cooked up a plan to surprise the rest of us.

We even got to Facetime my parents and let them in on the reunion!

 

Less than two months away!

The excitement has been slowly building in my heart since January, when our letters were signed and sent. Part of me still can't believe that we are actually returning to Milan! (Click here for last year's post on returning...it's still a true expression of how we feel to be going back!)

In case you're new to the blog, or just need a reminder, here's what's going on:

Our church has linked arms in partnership with a tiny, brave church plant in Milan, Italy. Like us, they focus their ministry on the college students at a local university. Also like us, they are passionate about discipleship.

This was our team with the students last year on an excursion. Such a fun day! Hubby and I are front, left.  

Each year, we send a team of students to encourage and help this church by putting together fun, interactive English Clubs for the students of Bicocca University. The clubs provide a great setting to meet students and build relationships.

We love the fact that we stay for two full weeks! That second week gives time for trust to form and conversations to go beyond the surface.

For many young people in Italy's post-Christian secularism, broken homes and shallow relationships are the norm. Knowing this, my husband and I have tried to text and Facebook our Italian friends throughout the year. Going back to the team and to our Italian friends--well, it's a bit like a family reunion.

Even though support raising is far from complete, my heart is full to bursting right now with thanks for friends like you who give to make it possible for us to return!

By our returning we tell the Italian students that they are more than a two-week project. The returning lends weight, not only to the friendships, but also to the declaration that Jesus is just as real and alive and life-changing as the first time we told them.

Never underestimate the power of persistent love. My own heart is proof that it can soften, redeem, transform.

Will you help us return? Click here for Fellowship Church's secure giving site.
**NOTE: please put "Castille Italy Mission" in the comment box before clicking "submit". This helps your gift go to the right place.

Will you pray?
Mark the dates for our trip in your phone calendar! (May 11-25)

• Pray for hearts to be open to the love of Jesus.
• Pray for us to be humble.
• Pray for courage and cultural sensitivity.
• Pray for Frank, Pam, Stacy, and Debbie--the long-term missionaries in Milan.
• Pray for every team member to reach their support goal by April 11.
• Most of all, pray for God's name to be famous and lifted high.

 

Spring Break: short but sweet

I now sincerely appreciate any and all student holidays. Like, really appreciate.

Even if they're not the long, luxurious swaths of time they once were.
Even if they're just a glorified, embellished weekend.

I am so thankful.

The University gave me two whole days off for Spring Break! The hubs and I savored Thursday slowly, puttering around the house and yard, doing laundry, meeting friends at coffee shops and parks.

Speaking of coffee shops, I tried out a new one for the first time on that beautiful day. As small as our town is, it can still surprise me! 1541 is a quiet, cozy little gem tucked away behind WallyWorld. Truly, it doesn't get as much traffic as it deserves. The Mexican couple who own it bake all the muffins and other goodies from scratch each morning and just look at the artwork they make of their cappuccinos!

If only they didn't close at 6pm each evening! If not for that small detail, I would make them my regular study place because of the low prices and quiet atmosphere. Regardless, I've resolved to give them some repeat business on weekends if only because I love supporting family-owned businesses.

Friday morning we were packed and on our way to my family! That evening Mom spent her gift card and treated Dad, Hubby and I to the Cheesecake Factory for my first time ever.

Can you tell we were pumped?

*Cue sugar overload for the next five hours*

The real centerpiece of the weekend, though, was the wedding of my dear friend, Jessica. Ever since we were kids, I've admired her for her ability to roll gracefully with imperfection and make the unplanned fun--laughing her contagious laugh the entire time.

Rain at an outdoor ceremony? No worries! Umbrellas make things cuter anyway.

Rain also has the power to give spectacular rainbows. What a stunning reminder of God's faithfulness on the day they promised theirs.

Back on campus

Somewhere above me, the sun is warm. The desk curves spacious to my left and a new sticky pad perches next to my complicated phone. It rings. I catch myself because the old greeting no longer fits.

"Office of Graduate and Professional Studies, how can I help you?"

There. I said it without stuttering. 

If you haven't heard the news yet, here it is: I GOT A NEW JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

After thirteen months in banking, I am back on our beautiful, bustling, homey campus. A shiny new parking pass swings from my rearview mirror like an old friend and I work in the basement heart of a dorm lounge, which is a strange place to process paperwork, but renovations will be beautiful she says. Her glance swings over the boxes and cramped filing cabinets that line the walls of our underground office, and I'm thankful I wasn't hired yet when they moved here.

Two weeks ago I was greeting customers; now I greet students. They come with varying degrees of anxiety of their faces, handing in wrinkled papers that have passed through five different hands as they collected signatures. Even though I have very few answers to offer, my favorite moments have come when kindness, costing me nothing, earns me a look of sheer relief and gratitude.

I feel a lot of gratitude these days!

For work at eight, instead of seven.
For the chocolate cupcakes that my boss brought to my last day at the bank.
For the eight luxurious days I'll have off at Christmas--stuff bankers can only dream of.
For jeans on Fridays and free coffee.
For access to thousands of books and online journals through the University library.
And best of all, I'm on campus.

Ever since graduation, I have missed the easy accessibility to the student world that made conversations with them between classes over coffee or luches a more-often thing. I was working only two miles away, but it may as well have been fifty. Now I am literally working fifteen feet below some of my friends' dorm rooms!

Let the lunches commence!

"He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me." (Ps. 18:19)

Siamo in Italia!

We are in Italy! As I type, the halls of Hotel Ornato are ringing with the thumps and thuds of an entire boy's footbol team. Their coaches are singing and drinking in the patio below our window, so sleep would be impossible even if I hadn't imbibed three cafes today...which I did. Those fancy little shot glasses of caffeine are incredibly delizioso and addictive.

But I'm glad; this is my first real chance to give an update since we arrived foggy-headed, stinky, and stiff on Monday!

Already, I am full of stories. Already, I want to move here permanently. (Kidding, kidding! ...sort of?) 

Already, my heart is aching again because so many of my new friends have no idea how deeply they are loved by God.

But stories will have to wait! Tonight I simply want to share some photos with captions to give you a little taste of the past three days. 

We rode the Christmas-light van to the airport... (still not exactly sure why those were there?)

The sunrise somewhere over the UK was *almost* worth having only two hours of sleep. Gorgeous!

Foggy London town wasn't so foggy, which gave us a beautiful view of close-set neighborhoods and fields as we flew into Heathrow Airport. 

The soda can I bought in London proudly proclaimed their commitment to never adding "NASTIES" to their product. What a relief!

We had a crystalline view of the Swiss Alps on our way to Milan--what a treat! For the next hour, I couldn't keep songs from The Sound of Music out of my head. 

Thankfully, the Italian landscape is much warmer than the Alps.

We were dead-tired, but of course, we couldn't sleep without visiting the gelateria for some delicious gelato. Yummy!

And this was the team on campus yesterday after the first successful English Club meeting. We were so thankful that God gave us the use of classrooms on campus for free this year.

And I'm posting my first update a little sooner than I did last year! *pats self on back*

I am so deeply thankful for everyone who helped us come again to this beautiful city. 

Seriously, ya'll are amazing. 

God is amazing. 

I am amazed that He chooses to use us. 

Can't wait to see how the next week and a half will pan out! Please take a minute right now to pray for our team; God is not limited by thousands of miles!