Karis :: Birder, Giggler, Listener to Hearts

There is something very surreal about a younger sister getting married. I can only imagine what Mom and Dad must be feeling.

Then and Now overlap and tug at each other when I look at her so happy with him, and I can’t help but remember the last two decades and two.

After all, this was the little sister who swelled our mommy's belly while I was five and six—old enough to remember the conversations with Baby through her shirt while Daddy held the camcorder.

This was the baby who made me so proud because her crib was in my room. We played peekaboo in the glow of the night-light in defiance of bedtime because her giggle was the best sound in the world.

This was the munchkin with the long lashes and the shock of crazy hair that stood up straight like something electrified in our family Christmas picture.

This was the kid who got a broken collarbone because my concern for the “rules” overshadowed my concern for her. And then she forgave me and never seemed to remember that it was my fault.

This is the little roommate who lay under me in her bunk and asked me to tell her about Heaven. So I did, and I never knew until our twenties that those late-night whispered talks had led her to Jesus.

This is the comedian whose talent for voice impressions from movies makes us howl with laughter. I am still convinced that she could work for Disney and make millions.

This is the peacemaker, the tenderhearted friend of every left out and lonely girl in the lunchroom.

This is the bird-watcher, the giggler, the listener to hearts.

This is the little sister who has become a best friend, an equal, an example of love to me.

Baby sister, beautiful woman, I am standing with you. As you promise love to each other forever, I promise too.

I promise to always be your friend,
to always pray for you and Mark,
to always be a loving aunt to your future babies,
and to always be your sister in every sense of the word.

Another sister is spoken for!

My last big announcement on the blog happened in August when I shared the news that my sister, Sharon, and her husband are expecting a sweet new baby in January. (Click here to see the adorable way they told our parents!)

Now, I have more exciting news...

MY SISTER, KARIS, IS ENGAGED!!!!

I'm honestly not sure which is making me smile more--my happiness for her happiness, or my excitement over gaining this guy as a brother! Mark is an amazing dude, and I can't imagine a better man for my little sister.

He had reserved a wing of a museum they loved. He had pulled all the strings, set all the details, asked my dad's blessing, and kept her completely in the dark through the months of planning.

When she walked in, their favorite song was playing, and a collection of easels set in a semi-circle proclaimed "I love you, and always will."

Between the easels was a table topped with a Bible flipped open to their favorite verse, a picture of the two of them, and a basket shaped like a bird's nest containing the most beautiful little ring.

Did I mention that she loves birds? *swoon*

When he knelt to propose, the music was too loud for her to hear well, so they both ended up on their knees, face to face, tearfully hugging after he slipped the ring on her hand.

Mark's little brother captured the whole thing on video! (When I watched it at work for the first time, I was ambushed by tears of happiness. So if you cry easily like me, consider yourself forewarned.)

They haven't set a date yet, but I'm sure they won't wait long! 

A letter to the bride

Little cousin, you were so lovely that weekend, radiant in your womanhood and your love.

You ran to us the night we arrived for your rehearsal dinner, all glowing and breathless with arms flung wide, and I felt like years and miles hadn't mattered at all.

You are no longer the doe-eyed little girl who made flower chains with my sister and begged us Olders to "be the bad guys" for your games. You no longer climb trees barefoot, sharing secrets with the Twin Cousin and concocting pranks for your big brother.

That was precious, but this, this new season you've joined us in--this is glorious.

You made those forever promises as you stood in your lace, and I leaned close to my own love and let the vows re-imprint themselves on my resolve.

You will see--weddings get a new layer of richness and meaning after you have your own.

The East Coasters were the last pockets of family to finally meet my husband. It felt like your new love and mine were initiated into the clan on the same fun-filled, rain-blessed weekend. Every outrageous game of Brandi Dog and Farkle, every crochet stitch taught--they turned our far-flung lives into community again and I remembered how much I love our family.

The couple that started it all: Grandma and Grandpa Beekman

Sweet cousin, I love you. I love the love I see in you, between you both, and pouring out to everyone within reach.

I pray you keep choosing love. Keep choosing humility.
I pray you keep choosing to open yourselves to friendships, even when they move away or get pregnant before you do or take a while to return your calls.
That you will have grace for the budgeting foibles that will come.
That you find a beautiful new "family culture" as you discover how to do the oneness of marriage.

Aaaaannnd I secretly pray that you move to Texas. (Because that would be awesome!)

Three years ago this day

Last night you nuzzled close to my face in bed and we looked at each other in the dark.

"Three years!" you whispered. "That's crazy!"

And it is. But if this is crazy, well Sweetheart, I've decided I like crazy.

On that day three years ago, I was nervous and excited and my cheeks hurt from smiling but I just couldn't stop the grin that bubbled up and took over my face. I was declaring to the whole world that you were the man I wanted to follow as you follow Jesus. I was becoming yours, promising my heart and all my years until I die.

We only learn the magnitude of a promise when we live it.

I don't need the pictures to remember how your face trembled with emotion when I rounded that corner at the end of the aisle. The way our hands gripped each other and your eyes glowed as Ray said "husband and wife".

It was the first of all the moments following, but we've had even better ones since then.

I remember how we danced our feet sore and you did that crazy backflip that freaked out the mother you'd just waltzed. I remember how I blushed when you reached up for the garter.

Now you backflip for the neighborhood kids.

Three years ago this day I could not have known how I would love you now.
Or how your voice inflections would become mine.
How your allergies would create a new level of health for us both.
How I could love a second family so intensely.
How the curve of your arm and side could become home to me.

I love you, Darling. Like crazy.

*I started this post on Wednesday, our real anniversary, but had such a fun date that night that there was no chance to post until now. :)

Spring Break: short but sweet

I now sincerely appreciate any and all student holidays. Like, really appreciate.

Even if they're not the long, luxurious swaths of time they once were.
Even if they're just a glorified, embellished weekend.

I am so thankful.

The University gave me two whole days off for Spring Break! The hubs and I savored Thursday slowly, puttering around the house and yard, doing laundry, meeting friends at coffee shops and parks.

Speaking of coffee shops, I tried out a new one for the first time on that beautiful day. As small as our town is, it can still surprise me! 1541 is a quiet, cozy little gem tucked away behind WallyWorld. Truly, it doesn't get as much traffic as it deserves. The Mexican couple who own it bake all the muffins and other goodies from scratch each morning and just look at the artwork they make of their cappuccinos!

If only they didn't close at 6pm each evening! If not for that small detail, I would make them my regular study place because of the low prices and quiet atmosphere. Regardless, I've resolved to give them some repeat business on weekends if only because I love supporting family-owned businesses.

Friday morning we were packed and on our way to my family! That evening Mom spent her gift card and treated Dad, Hubby and I to the Cheesecake Factory for my first time ever.

Can you tell we were pumped?

*Cue sugar overload for the next five hours*

The real centerpiece of the weekend, though, was the wedding of my dear friend, Jessica. Ever since we were kids, I've admired her for her ability to roll gracefully with imperfection and make the unplanned fun--laughing her contagious laugh the entire time.

Rain at an outdoor ceremony? No worries! Umbrellas make things cuter anyway.

Rain also has the power to give spectacular rainbows. What a stunning reminder of God's faithfulness on the day they promised theirs.

Our final wedding photo shoot! (no, I'm serious)

Guess what we did this summer? We took our final wedding photo shoot! Ta da!

Umm...yeah. Our wedding happened two years ago. We know. A little ridiculous.

We were touched that our photographer was willing to honor our package deal after such a wide time lapse. Yes, we have been finishing degrees, traipsing to Colorado for a summer, flying to Italy for mission trips, and other random things that make life busy, but two years? After this experience, I wouldn't be surprised if she put a new clause in her photography contracts. If you lovebirds are too busy (lazy) to schedule all included photo-ops within a reasonable six-month span of time, you will forfeit the unscheduled services.
I wouldn't blame her one iota.

I believe the "day after" photo shoot idea originated from the desire to have a good collection of romantic photos without making guests wait at the reception for hours. Couples usually don the wedding clothes again for a complete wedding day simulation.

As you'll see, we opted for comfortable jeans and t-shirts. This was due to the unbearable, sickly stickiness of Texas July heat...and the fact that all essential undergarments for my wedding dress were borrowed. But it gave me a chance to sport this fun t-shirt given to me by my sis at a bridal shower way back before the wedding! It says "I *heart* my hubby".

I was surprised by how little she had to coach us on natural-looking cuddliness! I guess we've learned a few things in the past two years. :)

If you want to see more, head on over to this album on my facebook page. And if you like her style, check out her other photos on Southern Charm Photography.

The Point of Bridesmaids

Seven times.

I counted this weekend, and was amazed to realize that I have been a bridesmaid for seven beautiful friends. How can I have been so blessed? These girls considered me close and wanted me there on their special day. They wanted me as a witness to sacred vows, to their new beginnings.

This weekend I stood as a man and woman made a forever promise to love, honor and cherish each other. (Isn't she stunning?)

As I looked at the list of women, I felt a growing resolve to continue to stand with them. Because we don't need friends only for pretty faces in the wedding album, or to help us bustle the dress. After the cake is eaten, after we're no longer newlyweds, after student loans and stretch marks and burned crock pot meals and PTA and decades of living life, we will need them more than ever. I will never outgrow the need for women beside me, for sisters' prayers, for witnesses that will hold me to my vows when they no longer make sense.

In the ceremony, my friend spoke of waiting eleven years for this day. I had only been her friend through half of that waiting season, but I had seen the tenacity and love and endurance of her heart.

A hope fulfilled is so beautiful. But even more beautiful was the beauty produced in her heart because of hope long deferred.

Switching gears...I have to share the funniest moment of the ceremony. (Because remembering these stories is another reason bridesmaids exist.)

Get the scene in your head: the bride and groom are on stage, each taking a turn kneeling and washing the other's feet in a ceramic bowl, symbolizing their commitment to serve each other in the manner of Christ. Her feet are washed, shoes replaced; no problem. Then the groom sat, and the entire room began to realize that his well-heeled, well-socked feet might be more difficult than her simple slippers.

 Looking back, a lot of it could have been avoided if foot-washing practice had actually happened at the rehearsal. That's what a practice is for, right?

The socks came off inside out...and then utterly refused to go back on damp feet. We in the bridal party started to giggle. The band started the refrain again, to buy time. As both bride and groom tugged on the stubborn dress socks, the giggles rippled out and engulfed the entire chapel. The photographer was laughing so hard she could barely hold her camera steady, but if she was able to take pictures of the hilarity, I'm sure they will be awesome. 

His first look

*Google Images

I have this habit at weddings. The crowd will rise and their heads will twist back, eager for a first teary glimpse of the bride on her father's elbow. But in that moment my attention is drawn to the groom.

*Google images

Eyes moist or dry, chin quivering or still, his face is always a study. In the safety of universal (or so he thinks!) focus on his bride, his deepest joy, love and tenderness for her come surging to the surface undisguised.

She is here, this is my beloved. At last. 

I have been the bride. I know her joy as the one presented, the one beloved, the one treasured by father and then groom. I also usually know the bride personally and have walked with her on the heart's journey from first butterflies to final soul-binding committment.

But when I look at the groom, I see his amazement at the gift before him. Can she be for real? She is. Wow. 

With every step she takes toward him, he seems to become more of a man. Not in the stoic American way, but in the noble, tender way of Aslan, ready to lay himself down for the beloved.

I guess I'm just enamored by any glimpse into the heart of Jesus.

This weekend I had two different vantage points from which to view the groom: from the stage on Saturday, and then from behind the carved pillar of a tiny chapel on Sunday. In the first, I peered around the pastor's shoulder and saw the groom's mouth open, half laughing and half crying for the joy of it.  In the second, our friend's eyes shone wetter and brighter as he unconsciously sighed several times and clasped his hands nervously.

One of the brides was the wonderful girl who rented a room from us this fall. We will miss her, but they're not living too far and I am sure some of their new adventure will run parallel to ours. (Yay for game nights and hangouts!)

Salty and Everlasting

One of my best and longest friends got married this weekend!  But before we all indulge in the gorgeous photos, I have a question: Have you ever heard of a salt covenant?

Instead of a unity candle, my beautiful friend and her new husband poured salt from two containers into a common one as part of the marriage vows.  Just as you could never return every grain of salt to it's original owner, their covenant will never be broken.

This might sound similar to the newly popular unity sand that some couples choose to do, but because the salt itself is a throwback to ancient Biblical offerings to the Lord, it means far more than inseparability. In the Law of Moses, it says:

"Season all your grain offerings with salt. Do not leave the salt of the covenant of your God out of your grain offerings; add salt to all your offerings." Leviticus 2:13

The pastor explained that in ancient Middle Eastern culture, salt was essential for curing wounds, preserving food, and was even used as money. Soldiers were often paid in salt rather than gold, which is why we still refer to a good worker as "someone worth his salt". (You always wondered, didn't you?) Wars were fought over access to this essential mineral, and it was seen as a symbol of permanence and purity.

It was valuable, which meant that it cost the giver something.
It was used to heal.
It was used to season and preserve the goodness of food.
It could cleanse impurities.
And it created thirst.

My friend and her husband were charged to be like the salt of their covenant, and I, listening, was stirred to do the same.

Here is a link to the blog where I believe the pastor got most of his information about the salt covenant.